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Letters

Letter 21 | The Dark Diary

1/9/17

What I should tell is that I am imagining about when and how I will see you. It calms me, but it also awakens the fear of losing you. I had tried to be someone else. That did not work as they desired. I fought for each of them. But, I never felt this way. Whatever I think is just saying to me that the wait is over. I don’t know what is in my plate when out of Here. I am waiting. I have patience.

My family will come. If being made is what it is like, then I am just consuming it. Even your thoughts are giving me strength to go through this. I will become better I feel so. I need my family even to survive in this reality. I feel stronger to live with the pain now. I can carry it and consume others’ as well. Whatever my destiny is, I feel it is uncomplete without you.

If desires asking me to walk with you then those desires never made me feel the worth of someone like you. I am hoping to see soon. My days and nights in Here are asking me to wait and have patience. I am doing so.

I wish I will talk to my family soon enough. Yes, dear, I am an addict. I am addicted to the way I fele when I am not taking any materialistic addiction.

Wait for me. I am on my knees. Bleeding the love I can’t hold any longer. I will see you soon. You are my energy to fight and make a world you see. Ich liebe dich.

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